1 hour ago
We can’t say that they upset the apple cart but they did upset the feed trough. STORY TIME - Sick PigIf we were late for class in the morning during high school we would have to get a late slip from the assistant principal. This was also our science and agriculture teacher as well and he was always interested in anything to do with farming. We were to have a good excuse to get our late slip. It was kind of like baseball - three strike and you were out, unless we had just cause. I would go in late and get a cool reception by doing so. When he asked me why I was late I would tell him that I had a sick pig and that I had to treat it or whatever other plausible excuse that I could come up with that had to do with agriculture. When I used the sick pig one he was immediately interested and asked me what was the matter with it. As he was writing out my slip I would try to come up with all the symptoms that an ailing pig might have. It would maybe be off its feed, listless, have runny eyes, with maybe some coughing thrown in for good measure. He’d then ask me what I had treated it with. I didn’t know the names of all these drugs so I’d just say penicillin and that would get me through. Actually I did have some pigs but they were all healthy as trout and I was still using the sick pig excuse for months after they’d all been shipped to market. In our english program we had a class called creative writing. If they had had one for creative story telling I think I could have been at the top of the class. I was late so many times that before the year was out I had about every disease known to mankind go through my livestock and towards the end of the year it was harder to come up with something original that was still plausible and not repetitious. I was almost resorting to unknown diseases such as Diapalukas of the Blowhole – But I thought that might be pushing it just a tad. ... See MoreSee Less
1 day ago
Our first baby out of our new heifers. She's a heifer calf and a sweetie. STORY TIME - AdsThere was a time years ago when The Guardian Newspaper in Charlottetown PEI couldn’t seem to get the advertising for their customers done properly. We would phone an ad in to them and when the paper came out we would find that our ad was maybe somewhat similar to what we had sent in but maybe not. It was never the same as what it was supposed to be and what we had ordered. One business owner we were talking to said that when he had an ad go into the paper that he was always more interested in what he might have to say than any of his customers would be. We had sent in several ads over a short period of time and they were all bungled up in one way or another – every single one of them. I had a cow to sell and Brenda was to phone in the ad to sell the cow so I wrote it out and said, “Here’s one ad that absolutely nobody could bugger up.” It was simple and concise. The ad read ‘Cow for sale,’ along with my name and telephone number – nothing too tricky about that. When the ad appeared in the paper it read ‘cows for sale.’ We had a very good herd of cows and everyone who read the add thought we were selling our whole herd and that ended up costing us over a week’s time between all the phone calls and the people who kept coming and coming to see our herd (that wasn’t for sale). At the end of my futile week, trying to get some things done at a very busy time of year for us, I was tempted to drive to Charlottetown and choke the life out of their printer. Maybe boil him in printers ink or at least shove his fingers into the printing press. One couldn’t help but wonder if their printer was drinking on the job or possibly he was taking a creative writing course in the evenings and was using the advertising that came in as a rough guideline only – very rough. ... See MoreSee Less
2 days ago
Early morning. STORY TIME - Sleeping BeautyWhen we were teenagers five of us cousins and friends decided we were going to go fishing bright and early the next morning. Being Sunday and all none of us had to work and according to the weather forecast it was supposed to be another beautiful day. We figured we would seize the day as they say, get up early, and go down to the breakwater in town and try our luck and ‘fishing expertise’. Our one friend wasn’t very good at getting up in the morning so I was to wake him up. He showed me a bedroom on the ground floor of their house where he would be sleeping. He was going to leave the window open and I was to stick my head in and wake him up and away we’d go. The rest of us were going to have breakfast first and then head out but he said he’d just grab something to take with him. Early the next morning I had my breakfast and headed up to his place to pick him up. I stuck my head in the window and called him in a whisper as I didn’t want to wake up the rest of the household - there was no response. I called a little louder – no response. I then resorted to ‘get your ass out of bed, are you coming fishing or not? – no response. I didn’t want to yell so I picked up a small stone off the driveway and tossed it at the bed but it didn’t go far enough and fell on the floor. So I went back to the driveway, got a bigger stone, and though to myself ‘this should wake him up.’ I hit the sleeping figure on the bed with a pretty good thunk but I wasn’t prepared for what happened next. I woke that figure up alright but it turned out to be his dad. He came off that bed like a wounded grizzly and was over to the window in about two jumps. He was in ugly humor and said, “What the hell do you want?” I was quite taken back and said in a small voice, “I was supposed to wake Terry up to go fishing with us.” His reply was, “He’s sleeping.” I was going to say that I figured that but on second thought I didn’t, I felt I had better leave well enough alone. The rest of us went fishing and had a great day. We must have run into a big school of perch because we sure caught a lot of them. The fellas fishing on the dock weren’t having much success so we gave them all enough for a good feed and then rowed the boat down the river as far as my uncle’s feed mill. There was an old table there and that’s what we used for cleaning our fish. From there they went into the freezer. Our sleepy friend didn’t show up until later in the day when our little fishing expedition was over and done with. I told him I was never going to try to wake him (or his Dad) up anymore no matter what the occasion. I figured if he couldn’t get himself out of bed in the morning he could do the next best thing or he could damn well buy himself an alarm clock. His Dad laughed about it all later but he sure didn’t seem to see the humor in it at the time - he shouldn’t have been lying around in bed that time of day anyway. ... See MoreSee Less
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